"For I know the plans I have for you, declares the LORD,
plans to prosper you and not to harm you,
plans to give you a hope and a future.
Then you will call upon me and come and
pray to me and I will listen to you.
You will seek me and find me
when you seek me with all your heart."
~ Jeremiah 29:11-13
Our challenge is to learn how to be the proverbial wind in their sails and not blow them off the course God has set for their lives. We shouldn't have to push or drive another person to success, but we can provide joyful support and positive encouragement and constant reassurance. We can be there for them whether they win or lose or succeed or seemingly fail.
When dealing with small children the Bible tells us to "train up a child" in Proverbs 22:6. One way we do this is to do it according to their bent or the way they are put together by God. Our job is to help and instruct our children in the way God made them according to their learning style (auditory, visual, kinesthetic), their temperament (chleric, sanguine, melancholy or phlegmatic) and according to the natural skills and talents and interests for which they seem to have a natural drive or aptitude for (sports, music, art, drama, academics, gardening, etc.).
One author put it this way, that it is our job to make our children our primary subjects of study. We are to learn about them in every way and to understand them. It's not enough just to dress and feed them and provide their basic needs, we must come to know them and then we can give them everything they truly need.
I think this principle can be applied to any relationship. As we come to know our spouses and friends better, their likes and dislikes, we can be encouragers to them in the way THEY need encouraging.
The other day my husband began to open up to me about some of his work stresses. At first I was moving about and actively listening to him, but still fumbling around in the kitchen as he sat at the table. I have been reading this "Power of a Positive Mom" book and Debi Pearl's "Created to be His Helpmeet" so my heart was already be prepared to encourage and to make my husband and children more of a priority. With that in me I felt a "still, small voice" inside of me that made me think I just needed to go sit with him. So I did. I sat for probably over an hour and just listened to this man of mine pour out his heart to me. At the end of his time of sharing we left that table more unified I think (atleast that is how I felt). He seemed less tense and more free. He needed to sit and talk and I needed to sit and listen. Because of this time we shared I was blessed that night as he took me out to the restaurant of my choice and bought me my birthday gifts early.
When we encourage and bless others often times
we are also recipients of blessings!
Study your subjects of encouragement. Make it a daily habit to learn more about those you want to encourage so you can be the best encourager you can be!
Today's action item: Continue to be an encourager in word and in deed. Say something positive and encouraging to those God brings in your life. Send a card or note or e-mail thanking someone for something nice they said or did or just because of who they are. Do something nice that you know the other person would like.
Resources:
1) http://school.familyeducation.com/intelligence/teaching-methods/38519.html Find out what learning style your kid is or at http://www.hypnosisworld.com/nlpmain.html or http://www.usd.edu/trio/tut/ts/style.html or http://tutoring.sylvanlearning.com/newsletter/0105/studyskillshs.cfm.
Lexi - seems mostly visual
Ainsley - seems mostly auditory or kinestetic
2) Know their character http://www.oneishy.com/personality/personality_test.php
Lexi - seems sanguine/choleric
Ainsley - seems mostly choleric/sanguine
Me - melancholy/choleric
Lance - choleric/melancholy
Bless and be blessed,
Michelle
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